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My Art Therapy Journey

Posts tagged Freedom

I’m so excited to share someone else’s art that has influenced my life deeply today!

I started listening to Alanis Morissette in my early 20’s. I remember belting out her songs in my make-shift garage studio/office where I painted into the early morning hours when my first daughter was just a toddler, thoroughly enjoying myself even though I couldn’t hold a note.  What mattered was that I had the freedom to sing!  My (now EX) husband worked 3rd shift which meant it was just me and music and art in those solemn hours between 11pm and 7am.   It wasn’t Alanis’ popular “Jagged Little Pill” that did it for me.  I really loved “Under Rug Swept.”    I think I connected with every song on that album in some way, but there were a few that I blasted out on repeat.  One of them was “Utopia” and another was “21 Things I Want in a Lover.”    I divorced my husband in 2002…and I can’t say for sure, but maybe these two songs, in particular, had something to do with me coming to a point where I chose to face the world on my own…without him.

There is a lot of art I could create about my relationship with my ex-husband, but that’s not where my focus is today….

TODAY…it’s about the present.

I have watched and waited for years for Alanis to release a new album.  And I have been hopeful that when she did I would once again be gifted with music that reached into my life and being.  Music that I could belt out at 2am that would help me get to “morning.”

So I’m ecstatic to share that she’s done it again!

She’s one of my “Liked” artists on Facebook, so I’ve known a while that she’s been working on stuff through status updates on her page.  I have been hoping, hoping, HOPING that my voice could return with her in her new release to the place I had been with her in my 20’s, but in relation to the environment I am creating at this point in my life…this present time.

I eagerly listened to the single the moment I saw it was out…titled “Guardian

Right on!

I listened to and read the lyrics…”yes, yes…yes! ” I thought!  I got this!

And then Alanis posted this clip about her inspiration…..!!

And yeah, I’m pretty sure she didn’t write this song just for me, but if I saw her in person I think I’d say to Alanis “Hey sister, thanks for writing this for me!”  : P  Like, somehow our hearts and brains are intergalactically linked and as she was writing she was thinking of me even if she didn’t know it.

Really good musicians can selectively have this connection with their fans, right? : )  So thanks, Alanis, for choosing me to have your connection with this time.

Oh…oh oh oh!  And get this!  You won’t believe what her new album to be released in August is titled….ready for it!?

“HAVOC AND BRIGHT LIGHTS”

 

I believe I need not say more 😉

 

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Today during Shavasana at the end of my yoga class we  (the class) were guided into a place we dream of, any place we’d like.

I have my place.  I know right where it is.  It’s actually somewhere I’ve had the grace to really sit, even though I had seen it inside me before I was ever there in person.

When I found my place…that special place in the world that is just mine…I knew it.  It was the place I had escaped to for  years.  It was like a working of faith.

But  my place in the world is a really small space in the grand scheme of things.  And when I place myself back in that special place in the world that’s mine, the scope is usually just enough for me to cram myself into it, barely.   I can rarely see anything around me or even see myself.  The surrounding areas are dark and I don’t have access to the full picture.  I get a very limited view, but I’m always excited this place is open to me at all (in my mind.)

Today something was different.  My place, the workings of my faith changed and opened up.  The story grew.

I was on my rock in the meadow, woods all around.  And then I got up and started to move.  And bears (my most feared animal and creature of nightmares) started coming to the edge of the woods where my place in the meadow begins.  They came and they would not cross over into my meadow.  They stood and watched me.  The bears couldn’t get me…Why?  Because I was dancing.  I danced in the fear and the joy was enough to stun them into awe.  They could only watch me…and never eat me.  I was stronger than the fear.  I knew they were there and I still danced.  I danced and leapt  and swung myself around and I ran and jumped like a giddy little girl.  My body knew no pain.

At the end of this sort of meditation, one more piece of the picture appeared in the frame: People who have hurt me.

Those people, like the bears at the edge of the woods, could not get me.  They could only watch in utter amazement at the life of me.

And I….could only be free.

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