I don’t need to read the Bible.
My whole life has led me God.
The Bible interests me for reasons other than knowing God or the idea of God. Except for the fact that I see God in people…and people are what I find in the Bible.
I am drawn to the Bible for the purpose of study. Nothing in the Bible has really led me to faith. So far.
This is not to say that it can’t or won’t strengthen my faith in the future, and not to dismiss the Bible and its importance or significance in people’s lives. But, given that, in all fairness I’ve barely read it, how can I not make these statements?
What does this have to do with my art therapy journey? I don’t know. It might have to do more with my journey, just in general. But my language, inside, is art…even when what comes out is words in a blog that don’t look or sound the least bit artistic. At this very moment, there is art forming inside of me. These are my thoughts…and thoughts lead to actions. At least, that’s what I’ve been told. For me, at least some of that action in my life is creating art.
I guess I can’t tell you why I believe in a higher power, especially when an overwhelming majority of events in my life wouldn’t point to the God I believe in, existing.
I say all of this as I begin down a path of embarking on Bible Studies. Along with my Art Studies.
Maybe I am putting this here as a plot point. A dot on the map so when I start talking about something I’ve come upon 5 miles down the road it all connects better and makes more sense.
I’m fascinated by people and culture and history. The only history class I’ve ever taken is Art History and it left me wanting for more.
Less, actually. Actually, less.
It left me asking more questions and yearning for context. It left me asking questions about how I came to be and how any of us came to be.
It left me with a plague of questions. Most people don’t want the plague.
My intro. class answered nothing.
So I don’t know where I’m going with this. I just know I’m going somewhere because this spot I’m in isn’t very homey.
I yearn for people and connection as long as they don’t get too close and let me come to them a bit on my own terms. Any sudden moves scare me away. And it’s like that with God, too. And that could be why I’m so interested in all of this. Figuring out what is psychological, sociological, anthropological and theological.
That is a lot of logic, if you ask me.
I never asked for this to be my brain.
And that’s why I have so many questions.
If I could change my passions I most definitely would.
Who in the world would choose this?
I think I would rather suffer in superficiality. I want to be addicted to “Omg!” (the yahoo “news” page) instead.
But that’s not the life I was granted.
The Serenity Prayer
||God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.